Our reality is the construct of our beliefs, reflecting our deservingness set-point. We do not get what we want or what we think we deserve. We get from life, from people, and from the Universe – what we (consciously or subconsciously) believe that deserve.
Although we can occasionally, by some miraculous strike of luck, get or receive something that surpasses our belief system, deservingness set-point, and our ‘income-ceiling’, we cannot contain it in our reality for long unless we reprogram our mindset around it and break through the ‘upper limiting’.
I could witness that in my life coaching practice so often, while working with amazing and highly intelligent women with the degrees from Oxford and other prestigious universities, newly promoted managers or newly appointed board members with rich corporate experience and outstanding results they achieved for their companies, or entrepreneurs who worked very hard to grow their businesses from scratch – who feel undeserving (unworthy) of the success that achieved and tormented by the thought of losing it all (who were struggling with severe cases of the impostor syndrome), and with women who were sabotaging the relationships with their ‘perfect man’, due to deeply rooted limiting beliefs such as ‘I would not be able to keep him’ or ‘I would not have enough to offer to such an amazing man’. It can also see it with lottery winners (statistics say that more than 90% of them lose the prize money within two years after receiving the ‘windfall of cash’), or many famous athletes and entertainers who go bankrupt after earning millions of dollars. Even though they received a large sum of money, they did not have the money mind-set and financial know-how of managing, investing, and keeping it.
I heard many of my clients who were working on strengthening their self worth say that it suddenly felt ‘awkward’ to them that people were suddenly treating them with respect or doing nice things for them – they were used to being treated so poorly by others that it had become their standard, their ‘norm’, something they were ‘comfortable’ with. We can get so used to scarcity, poverty, under-earning, being treated disrespectfully, being taken advantage of, working in a place where we do not feel appreciated, being in an environment where our needs are not honored, we are not ‘seen’ and our voice is not heard – that it becomes our ‘normal’ and expected ‘standard’, something that we are ‘comfortable’ with.
Even if we miraculously get ‘lucky’ to surpass our deservingness set-point, upper limiting, and income ceiling, and we obtain what we desire, our nervous system will be overwhelmed, our self preserving mechanism will switch on (in order to keep us safe and within our familiar reality), and our beliefs will be conflicting our reality so much (unless we work on reprogramming our mind-set) that we will self sabotage and eventually lose that ‘unbelievable’ and ‘too-good-to-be-true’ money influx/ prize/ recognition/ promotion/ opportunity/ wo/man that what we got/won/received/met.
Regardless of what you want to achieve, receive, or obtain in your life, you need to first work on reprogramming your mindset (embody the belief that it’s possible for you) and increasing your deservingness set-point – raising your standards and strengthening your self-worth, otherwise either you will not be able to earn, obtain, receive, or achieve it, or if you do obtain it by unexpected strike of luck or thanks to your years of hard work and unique talents being recognized by others – you will self sabotage and lose it all.
Massive action, luck, and strategy can only get you so far as your mind-set and deservingness set-point allow you to reach
How much (money, respect, success, praise, recognition, fame, love, luxury…) you believe you deserve and is possible for you to receive and obtain will determine how much you will be able to receive, obtain, and more importantly – contain within your reality!
Back in 2017., after working A LOT on my money mindset and increasing my income ceiling and deservingness set-point, I earned more money in one month that what I previously used to earn in a year. I did not implement or ‘try’ that month any new or different marketing strategy, and I ran no ads, but I signed up to double the amount of clients (even after increasing my prices 3X!). I am not saying the action steps, working on our goals, or sales and marketing strategies are not important – of course they are, but I witnessed that with the same amount of ‘action’ I could 12X+ my income, just by working on my mindset alone!
If you are not able to achieve something that you very much desire, even though you are working really hard towards it for a long time, and you tried multiple different ‘proven and tested’ strategies, it is very likely that you have subconscious limiting beliefs that are holding you back, and your deservingness set-point and/or your income ceiling is lower than your desired outcome/income.
Holding higher standards for your self and your life is not being greedy, it is about growing, tapping into your full potential, living your best life, and exploring your limitless possibilities. For example, why there should be a ceiling to your income in the first place, considering how many investing and other income earning opportunities to earn money are available out there, even trough passive income streams?
The only limit that limits you is the limit you set for yourself – your limiting beliefs about what you are (un)worthy of and how much is enough, much, and ‘too much’ for you. Where in your life, or in your career/business you are holding onto the low standards and scarcity mindset, accepting the poor treatment, and holding weak boundaries?
Raise your standard, reclaim your worth, and decide that you can have it all, you deserve it all, that you’re worth it, and you will not settle for less – and work on reprogramming your beliefs to match that decision. The moment you have that mindset shift, and you decide that you will not settle for less than what you desire and think you deserve, you will start moving people, circumstances, and the Universe in your favor, and yourself towards that direction.
When you increase your deservingness set-point, and then take action – your action will yield massive results, because it is coming from a totally different mind-set!
How much (success, money, respect, luxury, love…) do you think is ‘enough’ for you?
How much is (success, money, respect, luxury, love…) ‘too much’ for you?
How much (success, love, praise, gifts…) do you allow yourself to receive?
Do you resist luxury? Do you feel uncomfortable in ‘ultra expensive’ places, five-star hotels and restaurants, luxury fashion outlets, or whenever you receive any kind of ‘special’ treatment…?
Did you ever reject the gift because it was ‘too much’ or ‘too expensive’?
How much (success, love, money, luxury…) do you believe you deserve and you CAN have?
What if there would be no limit that you set for yourself? What if your ‘too much’ would become your new standard, your new ‘normal’, your new ‘enough’?
What if you would strengthen your self worth and increase your deservingness set point so much that your current ‘too much’ becomes your new ‘normal’? If you’re ready to step into your worth and personal power fully, click here to read about my signature life & mindset coaching program.
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