When a good friend, family member, or a person we love confide in us and tell us that they made a mistake, disappointed someone, or failed at something, we generally react with empathy, act with compassion, and start consoling them:
“You did the best what you could/ knew at the time…”
“Because you experienced one failure, that doesn’t mean you will fail again!”
“There’s no point to to beat yourself up now, regret won’t change anything…”
“You need to think ahead and focus on the future…”
We can show compassion to others easily, especially if those are the people we love deeply and care about, but if we made a mistake, experienced a failure, or failed to meet our own expectations, we can find it very hard to show compassion to ourselves and find it very easy to engage in harsh self criticism and self judgement:
“How could I be so stupid and naive!?”
“I am the worst mother/ manager / person…”
“I always mess things up…”
When we make a mistake, fail, disappoint, or ‘underperform’, we can treat ourselves the way we would never treat our best friend, or even our biggest enemy. We can be our own harshest critic (self criticism), judge (self judgement), and the jury (self punishment).
Self empowerment is the practice of picking ourselves up when we fall, forgiving ourselves, letting go of self judgement and self criticism, and encouraging ourselves with positive self talk.
If you enjoyed reading this post, I whole heartedly suggest checking out my book Self Worth – Women’s Guide To Increasing Self Worth, Self Respect, and Self Confidence on Amazon.